Despite living at the same college, and despite having 30+ mutual friends on Facebook, I had literally never spoken a word to Al before the night we slept together. Now all of a sudden he’s everywhere! In the JCR, at the pub, in the clubs I go to. Was I simply oblivious to his existence last term? We clearly travel in the same group of friends, so I’m not sure where my head was at last year. I suppose I just missed his inaugural day to our posse.
Anyhow, considering I had never spoken to before, and actually don’t remember much of our conversation that night, our subsequent encounter in the JCR was a bit awkward at first. I walked in, and though we briefly met eyes, I was immediately distracted and thus looked as if I completely blanked him. Great, I thought, now he thinks I’m a total bitch. The next time we met eyes I smiled, he smiled back. Redeemed. I made my way to the bar to order a drink.
‘Hey,’ Al said as he came to stand next to me at the bar.
‘Hi!’ I’ve explained my problem with being over-enthusiastic when I’m nervous.
‘How are you?’
‘Yeah, good.’ I sipped my drink as we waited for the bartender to serve him. ‘Oh! I found your university card in my room when I was cleaning the other day.’
‘Oh, wicked! I’ve been looking everywhere for that.’
‘Yeah, I’ll try and bring it with me next time I come out.’
‘Cheers.’
We talked about work and the impending term and other general small talk before I headed back to where I had been sitting with Russ, Cam, and RG. Al sat at our table as well and as he and RG talked I realised that I really need to stop sleeping with guys at my college.
T3, Foster and Dill walked in. ‘Be right back,’ I lied to my table. I walked over to the tube stops. ‘Alright benders?’
‘Yep, nice one.’ Dill said.
‘I am not gay.’ T3 said. He was trying to make a joke but it ended up only being funny because of his thick accent.
‘Of course you aren’t. I was talking to those two.’
‘Ooh,’ Foster said. He turned to Dill. ‘Hey there, what’s a pretty little thing like you doing in a place like this?’
‘Stop itttt,’ Dill said in his best attempt at an effeminate voice. Then turning to the group again he asked, ‘Drinks?’
‘Yeah, go on then.’ I said, having abandoned my last drink at the table of hookups.
As we walked towards the closest available table Grey walked through the door. Fucking hell, I thought. We had spoken a bit over the holiday break and I had run into him earlier that day in town. After catching up a bit I had offered an open invitation to come to my college bar, but had never expected he’d actually show up. He spotted us and walked over.
‘Alright?’ he asked.
‘Hi!’ I replied.
‘Alright mate?’ Dill said, but his infliction on “mate” made it sound like “dickhead.” Bless. I felt bad for the tube stops sometimes – having to deal with me and all. How were they supposed to know when we were liking or hating my exes?
Grey sat with us and I was again sat at a table with two guys I had slept with and now in a bar with a total of four guys I had slept with. It’s worth repeating that I seriously need to stop sleeping with people at my college.
We sat and caught up some more. I like Grey, obviously, or else I wouldn’t have dated him. I had finished my drink and after sitting and talking to drink-less Grey for thirty minutes I decided to get another.
‘Want a drink?’
‘No, I’m okay.’
I frowned. I don’t trust people who don’t drink. ‘Okay … be right back.’
Russ was at the bar. ‘We’re going to head out.’
‘Where?’ I asked.
‘Dunno. What’s good on a Saturday?’
‘Pfff,’ I exhaled. ‘Nothing.’
‘Yeah, it’s a bit shit on Saturdays isn’t it?’
I suggested a club that I actually loathe, but I couldn’t think of anywhere else.
‘Could be fun,’ Russ said, considering my suggestion. Then he said, ‘Fuck it. Let’s just go there. We’ve got a large group. It’ll be fun.’
I glanced across the room full of boys I’d been intimate with. ‘Yeah. What could go wrong?’ I asked. We ordered another drink and then rounded up the troops.
‘I’m gonna head.’ Grey said.
‘Oh?’ I asked, pretending to be surprised.
‘Yeah, I have a lot of work to do so I should probably stay in tonight.’
‘Okay. Well, thanks for coming by.’
‘Yeah, good to see you. You look really good.’
‘Thanks,’ I said, unsure where the compliment was coming from. Grey never complimented me. Random.
‘See you around.’
‘Bye …’ I watched him walk out the door, oblivious to the tube stops watching me. I turned around to see them all staring at me. ‘… Alright?’ I asked, sounding daft.
‘What was that?’ T3 asked.
‘Nothing.’
‘Are you okay?’
‘I’m fine, thanks.’ T3 had a psychic link to my mind and emotions. He knows when things are off and likes to play therapist for me.
‘Okay, but tell me maybe later how you really feel.’
‘I will,’ I said, giving him a half smile. I turned to Foster and Dill. ‘You guys, coming out?’
‘Nah, it’s well late.’ Dill said.
‘… It’s eleven.’
‘Yeah, bedtime.’ Dill said.
‘You guys are so boring.’
‘We’re sensible,’ Foster chimed in.
I made a snoring sound and pretended to fall asleep. ‘Come ouuutttt,’ I pleaded.
‘Nah, can’t.’ Foster said.
‘Won’t!’
‘Same thing.’
‘Uhh, not really. Fine. You suck.’ I turned to T3. ‘Are you coming?’
‘No. I can’t either.’ At least T3 had the girlfriend excuse, Foster and Dill were just lazy.
‘Fine!’ I seethed. Then, immediately over it, I added, ‘See you guys tomorrow for brunch?’
‘Totally.’ T3 said.
‘Yeah, sure.’ Foster added.
‘Alright, bye guys.’ I went back to my original table.
‘I finished your beer.’ RG said.
‘You would.’
‘Right, let’s do one.’ Cam said, necking his glass of red wine.
I winced. Our wine selection in college was abysmal. ‘How can you drink that?’ I asked.
‘I’m just trying to get fucked for as little cash as possible.’
‘Fair enough.’
We walked out into the brisk January night, having downed our liquid courage. There was a fair amount of us from college descending on the club and once we were in it was wicked. We all danced for hours. At one point I went to the bar to get a drink and stood facing the dance floor, surveying the scene. I spotted Al, snogging another girl from college. Ah so that’s how it is … I thought. I had met and slept with my male counterpart perhaps. Then again most guys are my male counterpart when it comes to my morally liberal ways. He must have somehow psychically sensed me because he opened his eyes, caught my eye, and pulled away from the girl suddenly.
‘What?’ she asked.
His attention went back to her. ‘Oh, nothing.’ He looked back at me for a second, but I turned towards the bartender, grabbed my drink and went to find Russ and Cam. I found them chatting up girls so I decided not to interrupt. I texted RG.
Where are you? x
A minute later my phone buzzed. Outside x
I made my way outside to find RG surrounded by girls from our college. Not in the mood to be part of his harem, I put my glass down and headed home.
I walked home, tired and drunk. Often I’m accompanied by someone. Usually a friend making sure I get home, or a boy I’m going home with, but tonight I was happy to walk alone. My best friends have been male for as long as I can remember – with the exception of my Best* friend – maybe that should be her name, Best Friend. Anyway, being sidelined on nights out by male friends out on the pull was nothing new. As I left the club I had considered the possibility of pulling as well, but my bed seemed more attractive than any of the guys I passed on my way out, and a good night’s sleep seemed more appealing than a shag at that very moment.
God, I’m getting old.
**Next time, how I didn’t take my own advice, and instead took home another bloke from my college!
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